What do you Seek? John 1:38

 The epidemic of drug use has, and I believe will, always be a problem.  For years our nation has sought to incarcerate before heal, further spreading the problem.  It is through drug use that our country – our world – is losing men and women, good men and women who might otherwise have been successful people.

It was through drug addiction that I decided to hang out with my “buddies” and smoke pot rather than work hard and go to college. It was through drug use that I became antisocial and refused to build relationships or sustain them. It was through drug use that I watched as every dime I ever made went up in smoke – literally. And it was through drug use that I blindly went about creating victims out of my friends, family and ultimately my community.

So I write this with not only a strong desire to stop the cycle of drug abuse but a fervent zealousness to pluck those I see caught in the madness that is drug addiction away from its grip. For me it nearly cost me everything. My parents, I’m sure, were on their last round of forgiveness; or at least should have been. My family only sat around shaking their heads at the mention of my name. You know the look, they let out a sigh and stare at the ground, every one suddenly gets quite. My friends were in shock at the waste of talent. And don’t get me started with what law enforcement thought of it.  It is in looking back that I am able to strive forward, ever wanting to see our world changed.

But this isn’t merely an issue of drugs. This problem we all know personally is spiritual. It is not in drug addiction itself that is a problem. The true culprit is in a relationship – or rather, a lack there of. We as Christians know this, when we have no sustaining relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ, our lives have a hole, a void that must be filled. So we stuff the hole with drugs, or alcohol, or stuff, or ego, or vanity, or cheesecake. But as Augustine said, “Man will have no rest until he finds rest in You.”

Paul said he has, “Become all things to all people.” Not meaning he is two-faced, fake or a hypocrite but rather, he speaks to everyone on their level. He goes and talks with the Roman at a sporting event just like he goes into the synagogue to speak with the Jew. He was imitating the Lord who , when He encountered others, met them right where they were.  Paul did this because the issue is not drug addiction, anger, pride, or vanity, it is a saving relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ , or, again, the lack there of.

Drug addiction will continue to rear its ugly head for as long as men and women are outside of a relationship with God. It will go on for as long as our broken judicial system perpetuates the revolving door like cycle of incarceration. It will go on as long as people ignore it and refuse to acknowledge that it is a problem. It will go on as long as moral deprived celebrities write songs about how cool it is. And it will go on as long as we continue to run in circles addressing every issue but the one that is the answer: Jesus Christ.

Jesus said, “Come to me all you who are weak and weary, and I will give you rest.” I believe that. I believe that to be the world’s answer. Do you? In the chasing after of whatever (you fill in the blank) do you find what you want? I guess it’s relevant that I mention this: one of the very first questions Jesus posed to the world was this one, “What do you seek?” (John 1:38)

Population: Me

I took the exit off of I-70 onto 23^rd street yesterday. I was heading back to work from the halfway house. They require payment to be made immediately after receiving our check which means I have to leave in the middle of work and run downtown, cash my check, and then run a money order over to the drop box. This all makes for a hassle. Thankfully I have a sympathetic boss who overlooks this; others aren’t so fortunate.

So I take this exit. It’s familiar off to the west because there is Prospect Ave. a couple of blocks away. Then there is the place where Beki is going to do her counseling, Beneld. I came to the stop sign to head back East and noticed a person – another person – sitting on the curb holding a cardboard sign. She was wrapped in a large coat and had a stocking cap on. Yesterday’s temp was in the upper 70’s so now, come to think of it, she probably had poor circulation and needed to stay warm. I could tell that she had no teeth because her chin pointed upwards as her lips curled in.

“Another homeless beggar,” I said to myself. (I write this to my shame) “Pfffff,” I let out a flat tire noise and drove on through, ignoring the sign and what it said. Besides, I had just dropped off half of my paycheck to a halfway house that I don’t live at, I am driving a beat up truck that sucks gas, I’m working a job that pays crap wages, I’m….

Get the trend? It was easy for me to ignore the plight of another person thinking about the misery of my own. With each grumbling thought I was able to push this woman farther away and with each bad thing I could think of that was going on in my life I began to see this woman as a con artist, a fake, a lazy beggar. I don't have to give anything if she is who I've made her out to be.

Proverbs 21:13 reads, “If a man shuts his ears to the cry of the poor, he too will cry out and not be answered.” I came across this just this morning in my daily readings. Oh how convicted is my heart! Here I thought I was doing so much of late, working so hard to build a relationship with God – and then the Holy Spirit reaches out and slaps a dose of conviction on me.

I could have done something – anything. That’s what I wrote in my Bible right beside the verse. I had an almost full bag of Cheese-It’s I could have handed her. I had a Bible track. I had loose change (although I am a big proponent of not giving anyone on the street money). I had my chicken noodle lunch I knew I didn’t have time to eat. I had…my time. I had 2 minutes to stop, pray with her, tell her God loves her and that this life is not it.

But I didn’t. My problems were too much. My situation was too difficult. My time was too precious – to me. My life was equally – if not more – miserable.

Its times like these I’m thankful for the Holy Spirit. It would be nice to have Jesus walking around healing people and proving His deity to us but that isn’t the plan. The plan was to send us the Spirit to guide us, lead us, and remind us that the world, like Matthew West sings, isn’t populated with just me.

3 Questions

I have a new mantra. Goes something like this, “Lord thank you for this difficult time because I know, in the end, I’ll be more like You because of it.” Isn’t it strange how the most trying of times works within us this unmatchable strength, yet when faced with the next valley of despair, heartache, loss, rejection or whatever else we never ask the important questions that help us remember the last time that got us to the top of the mountain?
My mentor Ralph, who I need to call today, drilled in my head this: When in a situation – of any sort – ask yourself 3 questions, “Why am I feeling this way, What am I going to do about it, How do I make it better?” With those 3 questions analyzed and milled over in our psyche at the very instant they happen I believe we can gain perspective.

That is what I’d like to talk about now that I’ve had a 2 month hiatus from my blog. The time is long overdue for me to write again and what better topic than the one of perspective. I’d like to use the Scriptures to aid me. Hebrews 12:6 makes this startling statement, “For those whom the Lord loves He disciplines, and He scourges every son whom He receives.” (NASB ) Ouch – yes, ouch literally!

I’ve had a rough go at things these last three months; quite possibly this has been the worst experience of my life by far. I’m bombarded daily with harassment and daily I’m forced to listen to someone berate me as if I were an incompetent child. But the author of Hebrews tells us that each moment we have in life that may seem unbearable, that may seem so unnecessarily insufferable is a chance for education, experience and most important, the chance to become more like Christ.

A few verses before this one he makes a statement imploring believers to look at the sufferings of the innocent God-Man Jesus and though, as Paul states in Philippians, He was God, He lowered Himself to that of a human so that He may suffer alongside us as the sacrifice for our sins.  “He disciplines us for our good so that we may share His holiness.” verse 10 tells us. It goes on, “All discipline for the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful…” And they call the Bible archaic! The words are no more true then, than they are today.

So I ask myself in this time, with three months left before I am clear of all the trouble of this broken institution, 1. “Why am I feeling this way?” Is it because I am uncomfortable and things are not easy so I want to feel this way? 2. “What am I going to do about it?” I should say a prayer; thank God for the opportunity because I know that, “He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.” (Php 1:6) And finally, 3. “How do I make it better?” I love the Bible’s vivid imagery that brings words to life and verses 12 and 13 give us this metaphorical prose to aid us in making the Holy Spirit’s words practical, “Therefore, strengthen the hands that are weak and the knees that are feeble, and make straight paths for your feet, so that the limb which is lame may not be put out of joint, but rather be healed.” I’m going to use this to answer question three by putting myself in situations that allow me to do good. If I walk on crooked paths or take the way of sinners – how then can I be strengthened?

Ralph is a big proponent of seeking out ways to make the world better. But he doesn’t just talk about it; he puts himself in positions to be about it. Verse 14 goes along with Ralph’s idea on life, “Pursue peace with all men…” for it is in our relationships that our pursuit of happiness is manifested. That’s the key for me. I’m going at all this alone; ready to scream so I shell up. I’m fed up with that approach so to answer questions 2 and 3, I’m going to start surrounding myself with my brothers so that I won’t go at this thing alone.